the Life and Times of Miss Madison

I am not hurt because kids in school made fun of me. I knew my sister and I didn't fit in-- we were different.  It was my mother's desire for us to attend a Christian School and I wondered what my life would be like, if we did. I saw a testimony one night that in a way reminded me of my sister and I. His mother made a decision that affected his and his sibling's life negatively. The Children made fun of because he was fat and ugly (I think he used the word "Ugly"). He said he used to pretend he was invisible. As I watched how his life played out, I wondered how his life would be if his mother thought of her kids and not of herself. My father was the same way. My grandmother grew up in Hanford and so my father wanted us to go to the same high school and schools his mother went to (even the same church). My mother call that Ancestry Worship. My mother's request was denied and we were put into public schools. My sister and I had different types of disabilities:

A thought occurred to me that maybe I was going through a Princess Syndrome, but I looked it up and found it wasn't me. At least to my knowledge it's not. The reason why I thought that after my surgery, after having the tumor removed, I saw for two reason myself as a princess. 1) I had lost weight and was able to wear the dress I have always wanted to wear since I bought it. I looked good in it!  It made me feel beautiful. 2) In the support group I was in, the hospital was referred to the castle and those of us who had a hysterectomy considered themselves a princess. After my Hysterectomy, I was somewhat spoiled. Since I couldn't do much during my recovery, I was waited on. I didn't have to go shopping, I didn't have to do the dishes or any work. All I needed to do was rest and take it easy. But I knew it wouldn't last. I began desiring someone to take care of me and since I felt like a princess, I wanted a prince. No  not a real life prince like Prince Harry