the Life and Times of Miss Madison

As I was wanting to find out the cause of insomnia, I searched the web. I googled "Is insomnia a symptom of Anemia" and I found an article from  Livestrong.com .  The article is called, "The Lack of Iron and Insomnia" It is an interesting read.  It says that although there is no direct cause for it, RLS (Restless Leg Syndrome) is  connected to it.  It makes sense because since 2000, I have suffered from RLS. I believe.   Livestrong is not the only website that will tell you Iron deficiency is one of the causes of Restless Leg Syndrome.  If you go to   Restless leg syndrome: Causes - MayoClinic.com ,  you will find the info there too. I posted a link in my support group because Iron Deficiency Anemia is a symptom of the Fibroid Tumor. It is interesting what people will say is the reason for my legs being restless. They haven't lived in my body for 15 years with a tumor growing in their Uterus. Of all the heavy menstrual  bleedin...

Ever since I found out the reason for everything I have suffered physically, I have been keeping a journal. You see I was diagnosed with a  fibroid tumor last month and one symptom that I suffer from is Anemia. So I will share with you what I wrote for my prayer group. Being Tired Having Anemia is the pits. That is how mildly I can put it.  It is also a struggle. However, it is not what else makes me tired and I think it is a symptom of Anemia: Insomnia. I have suffered with Insomnia for a long time, but I thought it was due to stress. After all, my father caused stress in the family, especially during his illness before his death. At that time, I was still thinking I would like to have the bulge removed. I haven’t found out I have a tumor in my uterus.  I can remember those nightmarish nights when I just couldn’t get to sleep yet I was too tired to do anything! Recently. I did research on Anemia. I found out that it is a disability because it hindered peop...

There is a saying that goes like this: The best thing comes to those who wait."  I guess then the best things are coming to me  yet it is hard...to wait when especially  when I have waited my whole life. God has a way of teaching us to wait. For over 17 years I have waited and still am waiting for God to fulfill his promise to me that I would return to Washington State.  For 15 years I have waited for this bulge which I have found out is nothing but a fibroid tumor that has grown so big I look six months pregnant,  to be gone! I also wait for other things too like for people to finish proofreading my manuscript so I can get it published. Do you know how hard and frustrating  that is when  your author friends announce they just got a book published?  Or how about when you finally get an answer to prayer only to find out that there is waiting involved? I had hope that I would see the surgeon this week so I know when  I ...

Most every woman longs for and desires it and it is love.  Even from birth, a baby needs it to survive (besides food, shelter,  etc ). I have never met anyone that didn't need love in their life, but not everyone gets it. I know from my own personal life, I have never experienced the love of my earthly father. My aunt tells me he did love me but in his own way.  "In his own way"?  Shouldn't a Christian parent love their children as God loves us?  I ...   never  ...   experienced ... It.  Really!  Yes, I am sure other children have felt the same too; these children were abused and or neglected by their fathers, even abandoned by them.  They get put in foster care because their own parents don't want them (that is how they feel). I tell you the truth that my father loved money more than me, but it wasn't his fault.  He was incapable of loving his children.  I also never receive affirmation from him either. ...

My faith is strong but lately it has been put through the wringer of sorts. Ever since I was a teenager, I had dreams like most female teens do: I dream of having a boyfriend by the time I am 17... Never happened. I dreamt  I would marry by the time I was 25-- also never happened.   I still had hopes and I still had faith that it was never too late. Even when I turned 40, I still believe that I could have my own family based on what I read in the Bible about women who had babies past childbearing age. You see, God is not limited and in His Word, it is written that God is the same yesterday, today and forever--He never changes so if Sarah, Rebekkah and Elizabeth had babies past 40 why not me? At 45, I am facing the possibility of never having children of my own. I wish I had married at 25 because  by the time I have my physical at 30 and my doctor says, "You have a fibroid tumor", it will not be too late to  just remove the tumor. I could still have children. That ...

Growing up, it seems that I never stay long at any church. The first church I remember going to was a Baptist church and I have always liked First Baptist Church as a child. However, for some reasons, my father decided to leave that church after a couple of years and take us to a church my  mother wanted to go-- Glad Tidings which  is an Assembly Of God church.  Once again, we didn't stay long because my father long to go to a church affiliated with or that his mother once went to when she lived in Hanford-- First Christian Church. It was the only church any of us continued going to until he got sick. The rest of us left after several years of attending the church and that was because my father gave us permission to leave his church (which he regretted it)..  The three of us continued going from one church to another and for whatever reason we left each. As for me, I stopped attending with my mother  and sister due to my rebellion and ...

I have often said I don't have a man in my life to love, but I have a cat I love even though his love for me is more based on conditions than anything else. Yet for now he is the only male in my life. I have another love too and I wrote about that. This love is different and  it is an example of the kind of love I don't  want in a man. I have been told that cats are independent and they are too some point. However, if they depend on their humans to feed them. And like all humans, they need love. Those are the two things they will ask from their humans and not return the favor. It is "You are required to provide these things for me because you are responsible for me."  Is not that about the same as children? They need love and attention from their parents, but they also give it back? The children do not say to their parents, "I don't need to give you love. You brought me into this world, so you are responsible for me."    I hope that my future husba...